Snake n' Bake
by Nanaki BH
Summary: SnakexOtacon Snake plus cooking plus lack of sleep equals bad idea.


Disclaimer: _Metal Gear Solid_ and all affiliated materials are property of Konami and Hideo Kojima.

Snake n' Bake  
By: Nanaki BH

"Snake, what the hell are you doing?"

Otacon crept into the kitchen, rubbing his eyes tiredly. The bright lights temporarily blinded him and he took a step back, sheltering his abused eyes. From the little he glimpsed of Snake… well… one could say that things seemed a little bit strange. Otacon allowed for the possibility that Snake was simply up getting himself some water in the middle of the night but he couldn't deny that it looked like more than just that.

His eyes burning and watering, Otacon slowly peeled away his palms from his eyes so he could peek back out at Snake. "Seriously, Snake. Are you tearing apart the kitchen or something?"

He had all of the lights on; even the miniature chandelier above their kitchen table. The refrigerator door had been opened and left ajar, some containers of food stacked around it. As if things could get any worse, there was a total mess of food and juice dripping out from the door. Otacon cringed just looking at it, fearing the sort of work Snake had left for him to handle. Snake had out numerous boxes of food and fruit scattered on the counter top. He had every cookbook Otacon had in the house all open to different pages on the table. Although it looked like he was trying to make _something_, it didn't look like anything specific.

Snake pulled back from whatever he'd been doing at the counter and clapped his hands together to form a cloud of flour. Bits of food and something that looked like fudge clung to his cheeks. "It's ready," he proclaimed triumphantly, holding up the mixing bowl. Otacon curiously raised an eyebrow, an absolutely incredulous expression on his face.

"What is it?" he asked, taking a seat at the table.

Snake instantly turned away with the bowl, hiding it from Otacon's view. "It's… uh… a secret. Yeah. I made it myself so you can't say anything about it just yet until you try it. I'm not going to let you see it yet even, got it? It's a _secret_." He grabbed a nearby pan and began pouring the contents of the bowl into it. "No peeking."

"Geez, you're acting weird."

"I was hungry."

"Are you always this weird when you're hungry?"

He didn't answer as he picked up the pan and haphazardly tossed it into the oven to bake. The time set, he came back to the table where he promptly collapsed in exhaustion. He was hungry? Hal found it hard to believe. He looked more tired than anything else. From what he had seen, his eyes were red and bloodshot and his eyelids were even pink. Maybe he _was_ hungry. Something about him looked ill.

He gently put a hand down on Snake's shoulder, giving it a light rub. "Are you alright, Dave? You don't look too good."

Snake gave a heavy sigh against the table, like he was falling off into sleep. It became clear to Otacon that exhaustion did some very strange things to Snake. Otacon decided to join him regardless, putting his head down, propping up his chin on his folded arms. The more he watched him, it became obvious that he was already fast asleep.

"Snake?"

No answer.

"Dave?"

When he still didn't get a response, he decided to do some investigating. With so many things out, he was dying to know what Snake was trying to make. He turned on the light to the oven and looked inside. The mix Snake had thrown together was actually rising but it didn't look like anything recognizable. "I bet he thinks he's making Jell-O or something," he said quietly to himself with a grin.

After turning out the light, he searched the counter top, expecting to find a common recipe of some sort among the open books. Unfortunately, he didn't find anything. What exactly was Snake trying to do without a recipe? What exactly _was_ that unidentifiable mess that was baking in the oven?

He was frightened from his thoughts, when he heard a sound. That feeling a person gets when they think somebody's in their house swept over him and he held his breath in fear. He slowly turned his head to the door and saw… nothing. He looked lower and there sat one of Snake's huskies happily eating the mess coming from the refrigerator.

He sighed with a hand to his chest. Getting so worked up over their own dog…

To make things worse, Snake shot straight up at the table, practically scaring Hal out of his skin. "My pie!" Snake yelled. Instantly, he was up out of his chair and was diving toward the oven window. Otacon would have reprimanded him for scaring him as he did, but upon seeing Snake's utterly confused face, he lost the words.

"What's wrong now?" he asked.

Snake just stared into the oven a moment longer. "This isn't a pie."

So exhausted, Otacon burst out laughing finally. A _pie_? He thought he was baking a _pie_? Snake looked back up to him and Otacon just couldn't resist his laughter. The hurt, confused, and tired expression Snake bore was hilarious.

"Sorry, Dave," he apologized. "But a pie? Seriously? You thought that was a pie you were making? That's terrible."

Snake wasn't sure what to say. When he thought about it, he didn't entirely even remember coming into the kitchen to make the thing. Clearly, he'd torn things apart in the process. Upon seeing his dog taking advantage of the mess, he joined Otacon in a laugh. "What the hell was I doing?"

Hal knelt down to him at the oven and kissed him gently on the forehead. "I had no idea at all. But I'll take care of this for you. Go get some sleep; you obviously need it."

With a sigh, Snake rested his head on Hal's shoulder. "I'll sleep on the couch. Keep an eye on me," he muttered, a hint of humor in his voice.

"And I might as well make you a pie. You've got everything out as it is. Want to taste what you made when it's finished?"

He grinned. "I might as well."

Author's Notes: The idea for this story came a year and a half ago probably; back when I was really into MGS. I've been dying to write it but I had no clue how to manifest it. So here's what I came up with for the most part. A hallucinating Snake sounded funny to me. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it. Feedback's always appreciated!


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